Rewrite...The God of Small things

Write on Wednesday Exercise 14 - The Mighty Mighty Rewrite...

Zanni: I did a workshop with literary author Mj Hyland, who teachers Masters in Creative Writing at Manchester University. She asked us to choose our favourite book, take the first paragraph and then write our own content into the paragraph, keeping the structure, tone, language etc. It's really helpful!

Here's my first go at WoW, I don't think I've attempted creative writing since school days! 

I love the God of Small Things by Arundhati Roy. I've tried to keep the tone and language, but change the context and weather.

Original

"May in Ayemenem is a hot, brooding month. The days are long and humid. The river shrinks and black crows gorge on bright mangoes in still, dustgreen trees. Red bananas ripen. Jackfruits burst. Dissolute bluebottles hum vacuously in the fruity air. Then they stun themselves against clear windowpanes and die, fatly baffled in the sun. The nights are clear but suffused with sloth and sullen expectation."

Rewrite

"February in Bourke is a hot hellish month. The days are long and tortured. Dust blows and seeps slickly into the crevices of cars and homes and families. Mirrored light shimmers a mirage. Black crows gorge on the battle-losers and blowies hum their hypnotic drone.

The nights are cooler but instilled with lethargic anticipation."


Comments welcome!