Wednesday 11 January 2012

Hunger - 5 sentence fiction


Lillie's 5 sentence fiction word of the week is Hunger.

She wandered, footsore, along the jungle track, her eyes scanning for edible fruit. She felt so alone and confused, having woken from sleep to find him gone, and that was three days ago. The reality was that there was no-one else on the island, no-one else to help her, no way of summoning help. Spying pink berries along the side of the path, she instinctively reached out to grab them and shovel them into her mouth to fill her gaping need. But she stopped in fright as, from the corner of her eye, she saw the moonshine white of a skeletal hand.



berries



5 comments:

  1. What a story! Well done. When I read the last line, I said 'oh my goodness' out loud :) Great job!

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  2. I did the same thing! Great story :)

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  3. Great details in your story! The last line made me jump too! Loved the added picture.

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  4. Yikes! Sounds like there might be two hungry people in this story...either that or those berries aren't really there, or? Really wondered what was going to happen next!

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  5. Well done! I especially like the "moonshine white" of the bones. My only suggestion would be to cut out "instinctively" and "to fill her gaping need" and see how it reads without them. It might have a little more punch.

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